Ancient Goblin Mace

The Ancient Goblin mace, commonly referred too as "Bandos' Cock" is a weak, inferior weapon with a phallic design to make the weilder feel as if he/she/it is giving a handjob. It's used by Goblins. During times of war, it is used by the mightiest of goblin warriors, who are pussies. However, when the war ends it gets soft and shriveled, making it useless. When struck with, the God turn their back on the one who is struck, because they refuse to protect someone who has been touched by that tiny, filthy, rancid thing. Ancient Goblin Legends say that sometimes, if the battle is extremely tense, white slime will squirt from the weapon. Goblins swallow the stuff. Since the last battle, sores have begun to form on the weapon.